If you believe the billboards and TV commercials, diamonds are forever. And they may be right, but just because the diamond is forever, doesn’t mean the marriage is. Which has left a lot of recently divorced women wondering what on earth to do with this ‘forever’ stone that no longer represents the timeless love they shared with someone else. If this sounds like you, and you’re wondering what to do with your engagement ring now that your divorce is final, let’s look at a few options…
Keep it. After all, it belongs to you.
You’d be amazed at how many Oakland County women choose this option. For some, it’s because the ring symbolizes hope and promise, even if that marriage that followed didn’t work out. For others, it’s a reminder of a time in their life when things were looking up and they’re still sentimental about it. And for some it’s simply the fact that it belongs to them and they aren’t ready to part with it just yet.
Whatever your reason, if you decide that you want to keep your engagement ring after your divorce, that’s entirely okay. Besides, hanging onto it means that all the other options we haven’t even discussed yet are still open to you in the future.
And if you have any qualms about what you should do with it, remember that the law protects gifts. And a pre-marital gift such as an engagement ring is considered to be the separate property of the gift recipient. So if you want to keep it, then you go right ahead. It’s 100% yours to do with as you please.
Give it back to your ex husband.
This is another very popular option for divorced women in Oakland County – giving it back to the person who gave it to you in the first place. After all, it was given to you to symbolize the life you would share, and when that life didn’t work out as planned, it makes sense to some people to simply give it back. In fact, this is a very traditional perspective, and the reason many women go this route is because they believe it’s expected of them.
Traditional engagement ring etiquette says that an engagement ring should be returned to the giver if the engagement is broken up by mutual agreement, or if the woman calls the wedding off. If an engagement is broken by the man, however, the woman gets to keep the ring. But that’s just traditional etiquette. However, it is not the law in Michigan. Our law says that an engagement ring is a conditional gift. The condition is that the marriage actually happens. However, if the engagement is off, the ring belongs to the person that purchased it. That’s different after the marriage happens. In the case of a divorce, etiquette and Michigan law state that the ring is yours to do with as you please.
One thing to consider, though, when making this choice, would be the sentimental value the ring may have had for your husband. If the ring was a family heirloom, you might consider giving it back to him simply so that it stays in the family. You may want to keep it out of spite, and that would be your choice, but being unkind to your ex won’t help you with moving on and healing after the divorce.
If you’re not yet divorced, and still considering your options…
Join us next time, when we’ll be talking about two other options women have for their engagement rings after divorce. Until then, if you haven’t even started the divorce process yet, but are still trying to figure out what you want for the future, come in and talk to our experienced family law attorneys.
We’ve spent decades helping people from all over Oakland County and the surrounding areas to pursue better futures for themselves and their families. We can help you too. So call us at (248) 479-6200, or visit us at our conveniently located offices in Farmington Hills. Evening and weekend appointments are available. We are here to help you work through this difficult time in your life.Let’s strategize together.