Many romantically inclined individuals spend hours fantasizing about their future weddings, (often long before they’ve found the person they hope to share it all with.) They dream up the perfect wedding gown, the beautiful flowers, the magical honeymoon getaway. It’s not called ‘the Pinterest generation for nothing, after all!
However, very few of them also spend time contemplating the legal ramifications of, say… smothering that same spouse with a pillow about ten years down the line after they’ve gotten on your law, raw nerve. Metaphorically speaking, of course. Yet that’s where so many people end up, years or decades into their marriage. Sitting across the dinner table from a stranger, biting back years of scathing retorts and wondering if it’s really worth going to prison for stabbing their spouse with a dinner fork, metaphorically speaking. Sometimes it’s nothing more than the two of you having just grown apart.
We can probably all agree that this isn’t a happy or healthy place to be. So if you’re there – in that unhappy, unhealthy place, ready to explode and let the pieces fall where they may, perhaps it’s time to talk about your exit strategy.
This can be a very elaborate, or very simple plan for your future. Though whatever route you choose for exiting your marriage and creating a new life for yourself, there are a couple of pointers we suggest you consider:
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Discuss your concerns with an experienced divorce lawyer.
Meet with a recommended divorce attorney right here in Oakland County, and ask them if they have any other suggestions that may help you to prepare for what lies ahead. An experienced family law attorney will be able to provide you with a good idea of what the process involves, how long it will take, and how much it will cost. Obviously, there are things that crop up along the way that may influence this projection, but a skilled attorney will be able to prepare you by explaining important factors in your divorce. Things like child support payments, parenting time schedules and asset division. Our family law team is often hired months before a divorce case is file for the purpose of strategic planning before the filing.
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Get yourself a good therapist.
Or counselor, or specially trained member of the clergy. Someone you can talk openly to, who will listen and help you cope with whatever you’re struggling with. You will need someone to provide you with helpful suggestions and information as you prepare. A therapist, especially a good one, will be able to suggest other professionals to help you with different aspects of this process (for example, financial advice when working out your budget) and also assist you in confronting your emotions and finding healthy coping skills. After all, this may get worse before it gets better.
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Don’t tie up any of your capital
If possible, don’t make any major purchases or spend money in any significant quantity. Buying another home, a recreational vehicle or even just a new living room furniture set that will need paying off, is unwise if you are planning to leave your spouse. Divorces can be very costly and the more cash you have available the more you will have available to reduce your debt and to get started with your new life.
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Consider your future career and earning potential.
Regardless of whether you’ll be likely to get spousal support or you have to pay it, you’ll need all the earning power you can get. So if you’ve been giving any thought to finishing up that degree or getting some technical training which would allow you a potential income upgrade in the future, now is the time to do it. Again, changes in income will likely affect your divorce case. Plan this carefully with your divorce lawyer.
Like Benjamin Franklin once said, “By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” So don’t set yourself up to fail. Come in and talk to one of our very experienced family lawyers today. We can help you prepare your exit strategy and answer your questions about divorce in Michigan. Call (248) 479-6200, or stop by our conveniently located office on Northwestern Hwy in Farmington Hills. We are here to help you.